Extreme Self-Care Checklist + Strategies

The philosopher Socrates once declared, “An unexamined life is not worth living.” No matter how far our journey takes us, questions inevitably arise—questions that delve into the essence of self, life’s mysteries, and our direction. They stand as beacons, guiding us through self-reflection, probing inquiries about existence, and unveiling the layers that define us.

These questions form an intricate tapestry, weaving threads of introspection, exploration, and clarification. Their purpose is to unveil our present state, illuminate the path we’ve traveled, and chart the course we envision for ourselves. For, indeed, an unexamined life lacks the depth and richness that make existence meaningful.

Amid the tumultuous waves of existence, these questions act as our navigational tools. They guide us as we navigate through life’s changing tides, adapting and growing with every challenge faced.

I, too, embarked on this journey of self-discovery. In a recent chapter of my life, the pressures of adulthood, relationships, and career choices became overwhelming. Recognizing the need for clarity, I initiated a process of self-examination, illuminating the aspects of my life that required attention.

This journey led me to unravel the threads of self-betrayal and unclear beliefs that had ensnared me. I realized that true fulfillment begins within—prioritizing oneself over external validation, nurturing authenticity, and protecting one’s inner strength from dilution.

The essence of these questions lies in their potential to reshape our reality. They carve a path toward a more positive and meaningful life by inviting us to contemplate our choices and beliefs. Through the illumination of introspection, we unlock doors to personal growth and transformation.

Creating a haven of positivity within ourselves attracts positive energy, resulting in growth and empowerment. By framing questions that accentuate positivity, we cultivate an environment conducive to personal development.

So, let’s journey together into the depths of introspection. With each question, we peel back the layers, illuminate our inner voice, and navigate the challenges of existence. These questions not only serve as guiding stars but can also be wielded as tools to empower and inspire—a journey of self-discovery and evolution that transcends mere survival and blossoms into a life truly lived.

1.  What Phase Are You In Currently?

• What is this phase teaching you?
• Did you learn what you need to carry on to the next phase?
• Are you unlearning?
• What has brought you the most joy and the most challenge and how has that shaped you?

Life, an intricate tapestry of experiences, unfurls before us as a treasure trove of lessons. Each segment, a chapter in its own right, holds wisdom waiting to be unraveled. With every turn of events—be it the gentle descent of petals, the resolute fall of leaves, the tenacious rooting, the triumphant ascent, or the vibrant bloom—resides a profound lesson, tucked within the folds of existence.

Our journey is an odyssey of experiences, a canvas painted with moments that beckon growth. Like signposts on a winding road, these experiences offer guidance, molding us for the arduous yet exhilarating voyage ahead. Amidst the ebb and flow, the cycle of withering and resurgence, lie the seeds of wisdom that propel us forward.

Indeed, our experiences become the crucible of growth, a crucible that tempers us and nurtures us. They serve as life’s mentors, imparting vital lessons and honing our resilience. In times when the horizon seems shrouded in uncertainty, it’s essential to remember that even in apparent chaos, there exists an intricate web of lessons waiting to be discovered.

While life’s upheavals may seem overwhelming, they are the building blocks of strength and knowledge. Each fall, each rise, each moment of doubt, and each victory converges into a symphony of growth. Embrace these lessons, for they are the compass guiding us through the labyrinth of life—a continuous journey of transformation and elevation.

The intricate dance between dreams and the constraints of reality, there comes a moment when equilibrium falters, and aspirations appear magnified through the lens of limitations. Yet, even amidst shattered surroundings, remember that rock bottom serves as the perfect foundation for rebuilding anew. Each scar earned through the tumultuous struggle of survival is a badge of honor, every misstep a prelude to a victory dance awaiting its time—Titilope Sonuga echoes this truth.

Survival, an intricate language, beckons us to grasp the art of letting go and holding on. Every experience we encounter serves as a brick, meticulously layered to construct the path we tread. The universe, a silent mentor, imparts lessons through each twist and turn, preparing us for the seasons yet to unfold.

This philosophy has been my solace, a comforting lift in moments of dwindling endurance. In the face of adversity, I inquire: What lessons does this phase conceal within its folds? What are the teachings—both negative and positive—that it holds? How can I transmute this knowledge into a transformative force, an uplifting power? These queries, often accompanied by heartfelt cries, compose my refuge.

Life, by its nature, brandishes rough edges, sculpting us through its trials and tribulations. Navigating these contours is a challenge, but it’s precisely our ability to discern wisdom from past missteps that guides us toward mastery. So, dear friend, if the momentum to persevere wanes, seize the moment to question: What is this phase teaching me?

Sometimes, the revelation may be obscured, lying dormant until we’ve moved beyond that very juncture. I maintain a digital record—a sanctuary where I meticulously outline every lesson garnered from my darkest phases. These lessons, akin to badges of wisdom and fortitude earned in the battle of survival, become my guiding light. In moments of triumph, I revisit these notes, reciting them aloud, for they remind me of the progress I’ve made.

I urge you to embark on this transformative exercise and share your findings. Embrace this practice, for it kindles motivation and unveils the intrinsic value of challenging phases. Through this journey of reflection and revelation, you’ll find solace in adversity and ascend with newfound vigor.

2.  What Are You Holding On To That Is Limiting You?

• What are you creating toxic space for?
• What positive thoughts about myself can I focus on?

The flurry of life’s inquiries, I implore you to take a moment—a deliberate pause before you respond. Traverse the terrain of your experiences, let the echoes of your journey resound. In the labyrinth of survival, we form connections, lose our way, and inadvertently carry along the weight of limitations, both seen and unseen.

Life’s metamorphosis is painted across its canvas, a tapestry woven by threads of adaptation, transition, and growth. Yet, adjusting to these changes isn’t always a seamless process. A mere few months ago, my mental landscape resembled a taut tightrope. A sense of purpose eluded me; I grappled with self-imposed limitations, and the cacophony of self-doubt echoed loudly.

Through this chapter, I belittled even the smallest of my achievements, muted my authenticity, and relinquished permission to be unabashedly me. My voice and intuition, once my compass, were stifled, my beliefs compromised, and my focus skewed toward others rather than myself.

In the aftermath, I discovered the dual nature of experiences—a spectrum of challenge and empowerment. Rather than lingering in the realm of anger and regret, I relinquished the grip on past mistakes. These very blunders, once a source of frustration, became stepping stones on the path toward empowerment and resilience.

Gentleness replaced judgment as I forgave myself, allowing space for growth. A transformational journey emerged—one of self-assertion, self-approval, and self-prioritization. With each footstep forward, I learned to advocate for my voice, to grant myself permission to shine brightly, and to hold steadfast to my beliefs. The shift wasn’t without effort, but as I carved out time for self-care, I fortified my foundation.

This is the message I carry forward, a testament to the enduring power of introspection and adaptation. I urge you, too, to traverse your own narrative, granting yourself grace and learning to embrace every twist and turn. The journey is marked by these shifts, these lessons, and these moments of self-discovery. As you emerge from the cocoon of introspection, may you do so with the wisdom that every experience, every challenge, contributes to the mosaic of your strength and self-empowerment.

3.  Have You Cared And Nourished Yourself?

The symphony of survival, amidst the teachings of society urging us to find balance, to succeed, and to flourish, we often find ourselves navigating a path of uncertainty. While society imparts lessons in struggle and success, it often overlooks the essential practice of maintaining our mental and physical well-being.

As we chart our course through the trials and triumphs, as we stake our claim in the realm of boundaries and carve a way through life’s turbulence, we must not overlook the imperative act of tending to ourselves. This practice, seemingly modest in its scope, emerges as an undeniable necessity—a means of safeguarding our internal fortitude and external equilibrium.

Consider, for a moment, the power of tending to yourself, a practice woven into the fabric of life’s nuances:

1. Crafting moments of solace, nurturing your “me time.”
2. Imbibing your soul with serenity, embracing moments of tranquility.
3. Liberating yourself from the shackles of past limitations.
4. Engaging in routines that foster productivity and growth.
5. Affirming your intrinsic worth, declaring your value.
6. Choosing yourself amidst life’s myriad demands.
7. Honoring yourself with utmost respect and care.
8. Erecting boundaries, maintaining a haven of balance.
9. Uprooting negativity, cultivating a haven for positivity.
10. Prioritizing your own well-being, countering the instinct to put others first.

Tending to yourself becomes a tender act of self-nurturing, an embodiment of a series of commitments. Each step, however seemingly small, contributes to the resounding symphony of your well-being. As you navigate this journey, consider employing the reflective power of self-inquiry. Pose questions that probe your inner landscape, nurturing your internal resilience while fostering external harmony.

In the mosaic of life, may the art of self-tending become your sanctuary—a reminder that amidst the cacophony of survival, your well-being is paramount. As you tend to yourself, may you find balance, strength, and an enduring sense of vitality.

4.  Are You Embracing And Accepting Changes Or Life Transition?

The Life Compass unveiled a question, a question that echoes with empowerment and resilience—a question that confronts the arrival of change and the acceptance of transition. For me, change had always been a formidable specter, a looming challenge that stirred unease within. The prospect of learning anew, unlearning the familiar, releasing the past’s grip, and assuming greater responsibility as reality unfolds often cast a shadow of trepidation. Yet, within the folds of acceptance, I discovered the key to unlocking a life of profound fulfillment—a life that transforms daunting transitions into blissful adventures.

This question, whispered by the Life Compass, acts as a steadfast guide. It’s a reminder to continually assess the pieces we’ve overlooked, the fragments of our journey that we might have left unexplored. Life, as it unfolds, isn’t a perpetual state of bliss; it’s an intricate tapestry woven with threads of challenge. Change might manifest in various aspects—perhaps in our finances, where increments bring forth both overwhelming delight and the challenge of managing an adjusted budget. Yet, within each change, lies the potential for growth, the essence of life’s captivating adventure.

Let’s acknowledge a fundamental truth—we are all players of blank cards in the grand game of life. While we may harbor a vision of our destination, the route is veiled until traversed. As we journey, we grasp for the best, hoping to navigate the enigmatic pathways with wisdom and courage. Life, too, has its strategy—it tests us, offers moments of reflection, and nudges us to introspect before we lay our cards bare.

The empowering question bestowed by the Life Compass—this is the lantern that illuminates the path, igniting a profound connection with the changes life orchestrates. It beckons us to embrace the unknown, to venture into the uncharted, and to mold each transition into a badge of courage. With each change, we realize that life’s essence is a sum of these transitions—moments that mold us, empower us, and propel us toward a future we’re yet to uncover.

5.  What Mindsets Are You Pursuing?

1. What positive thoughts can I embrace about myself?
2. From whence does this thought arise—does it stem from within or beyond?
3. Does this thought belong to me, or does it bear the echo of someone else’s voice?
4. What lessons can I glean from this thought’s presence in my mind?
5. What belief attaches itself to this thought, subtly shaping my perception?
6. How long has this belief been entrenched within me, influencing my narrative?
7. From what source does this belief derive its origins—personal or external?
8. Has this belief woven its purpose into my life’s fabric, or has it surpassed its relevance?
9. Can I, with intention, release both thought and belief, allowing them to disperse?

The canvas of our minds unfurls as an alluring template, beckoning the thoughts we cultivate within. To nurture a positive mindset is to craft a sanctuary of well-being, benefiting both mental and physical health—a beacon guiding us toward resilience and empowerment.

In my personal journey, there was a juncture where the concept of a positive mindset eluded me. Assumptions, fears, insecurities, and self-imposed limitations dominated my mental landscape. Stagnation reigned, as I hesitated to embrace risks and opportunities, tethered to the grip of apprehensions. Yet, I embarked on a transformative voyage—to stand firm against the currents of fear that sought to sway me.

Negativity still occasionally lingers, but I’ve honed the art of discernment, redirecting my focus away from the shadows of doubt. I’ve curated two comprehensive articles that illuminate the path toward a positive mindset, offering invaluable insights and empowering mindset hacks.

Challenging the essence of our inner dialogue is essential. Our minds operate as the intricate gears of our being, propelling us forward when properly aligned. Instead of succumbing to the weight of uncontrollable circumstances, I harnessed my energy to foster creation and elevate the vibrations I impart to my experiences. Over time, I witnessed personal growth burgeon from this shift in perspective.

Acknowledging my journey as a perpetual work in progress, I continue to navigate the labyrinth of positivity’s lessons—embracing growth through continuous learning and unlearning. This journey is open to all, ripe with possibilities.

To remain steadfast on this transformative path, I invite you to explore these pivotal questions—an inner compass guiding you through transitions, crises, challenges, or times of uncertainty:

1. What thoughts do I nurture within?
2. Where does my mind’s focus lie?
3. What trajectory does my mindset steer me towards?
4. Do my thoughts foster progression?
5. Am I wielding my mental strength by cultivating these thoughts?
6. What moments of gratitude and positivity can I embrace at this juncture?
7. What am I holding onto that warrants release?
8. How am I nurturing my mental conditioning?

6.  What Do You Want To Add And What Do You Want To Release?

Pause and reflect—this question dives deep into the recesses of your being. As you revisit these queries, consider the profound meanings they unveil. Amidst the tumultuous dance of survival, we often cling to various crutches of support—unwittingly hindering our growth and constraining our evolution.

Perhaps it’s an entangled toxic relationship, a strained connection shrouded in the veil of anticipated change. Or maybe, it’s yielding your boundaries to familial demands, a fear of being labeled as impolite or self-centered. External validation becomes a balm for fleeting self-worth, while past errors and experiences shackle you, fostering self-sabotage. The past, once a scaffold of protection, now impedes progress.

Indeed, we’ve amassed a repertoire of coping mechanisms, tools that once shielded us in adversity. Yet, holding onto these relics of safety, long after their purpose has waned, stagnates growth. The pivotal point arrives—to pay homage to their service, and then relinquish them, unlearning what no longer serves our advancement. Don’t clasp onto wounds so tenaciously that healing finds no room to flourish—wisely said by Lisa Oliver.

Allow me to impart a practical tool, excerpted from Lisa Oliver’s wisdom:

Methods to Engage with and Dissolve Challenging Emotions:

1. Engage in mindful presence.
2. Harness the power of somatic exercises and conscious breathwork.
3. Embrace a self-compassion mantra, nurturing your inner dialogue.
4. Partake in a brisk five-minute walk, or substitute with energetic activities like jumping jacks or stretching.
5. Shift your surroundings, altering your environment’s influence.
6. Inquire within—determine when to introduce or relinquish.
7. Remind yourself of your inherent safety, grounding your emotions.
8. Craft a tailored blueprint to consult when needed.

The moments when self-doubt emerges, consider these guiding questions:

What might I require in this instance? What observations are surfacing within me? Could a specific trigger have instigated this sentiment?

Amidst the tumult of self-doubt, hold onto these affirmations:

Self-doubt is a shared human experience; acknowledging it doesn’t validate its accuracy. Observing this emotion without immediate action is permissible.

Grant yourself the gift of time, space, and introspection:

Permit the emotion to flow. Delve into its depths, nurturing curiosity. Empower yourself to craft a deliberate response.

Over the past three months, I’ve meticulously cultivated a routine—a ritual for releasing the toxicity that clings to my energy. I’ve liberated myself from the shadows of fear, restrictive beliefs, and past errors. This journey of overcoming darkness has propelled me forward.

Intriguingly, I’m crafting a release tool, one designed to help you expand your perspective, shed the weight of apprehension, eradicate self-betrayal and sabotage. Embrace your potential to seize the reins of life and immerse yourself in positivity. A secret project is underway, and I’m not spilling the details… Shh!

Don’t delay—join my email list as an “Illuminator” or follow me on Instagram. Be among the first to experience this revelation when it unfurls. Remember, growth is a challenging pursuit, demanding the dance of learning and unlearning, as well as the courage to let go. By relinquishing negative boundaries, you carve out space for the nurturing elements that propel your transformation.

7.  What Am I Grateful For Right Now?

Gratitude, a magnet for happiness and positivity, has the power to color our experiences with joy. No matter where our journey leads us, within every phase and circumstance, a reservoir of reasons to be grateful lies waiting to be tapped into. The practice of gratitude is akin to stitching a vibrant thread into the fabric of our lives, enhancing its texture and beauty.

Incorporating gratitude into our lifestyle is an endeavor of paramount significance. It’s remarkable how often we may overlook the abundant blessings that are ours to enjoy. By adopting a lens of appreciation, we infuse our existence with newfound happiness and depth.

8.  What Am I Afraid Of? How Can I Work On These Fears

What is it that I fear so intensely, dreading the pain it might bring into my life? For far too long, my life was constrained and stifled by the grip of fear. It seemed as though fear had the power to amplify challenges and limitations that were well within my ability to conquer.

Fear held me back, urging me to forget everything and flee rather than confront the obstacles and rise above them. It took time, but I eventually grasped the concept that fear could serve as the fuel for success. It wasn’t an impediment meant to confine me, but rather a catalyst propelling me towards the direction I aimed to pursue. In a revelation, I discovered that the term “fear” was a construct I held complete control over.

The key to unraveling the complexity of fear lies in comprehension and acknowledgment. I realized that our fears are essentially negative thoughts that we inadvertently craft to commandeer our minds. Until we learn to reclaim authority over our minds with a surge of positivity, we remain tethered by our limitations and fears.

Empowerment emerges from understanding, and it is only through this understanding that we can break free from fear’s grasp. By flipping the narrative and directing our thoughts towards positivity, we grant ourselves the capacity to transcend limitations, surmount fears, and nurture our personal growth.

9.  What Is The Meaning Of Life? What Is My Purpose?

Navigating life’s transitions and shifts can be a perplexing journey, often leaving us grappling with the question of our purpose. It’s a question that takes on newfound significance, especially as we find ourselves in our 30s and 40s, realizing that the trajectory we’re on may not align with our long-forgotten aspirations.

I’ve crafted a comprehensive guide titled “6 Unexpected Ways to Discover Your Life’s Purpose” that aims to assist you in meticulously designing the life you envision. The guide delves into uncharted methods that can lead you to uncover your true purpose and set your course towards success.

Far too many of us awaken to the truth of our circumstances later in life, feeling adrift without a clear sense of direction. This guide is born from my personal journey and outlines a step-by-step process that propelled me toward the path of success. Through my own experiences, I’ve crafted a transformative tool designed to help you unveil your purpose, recognize your inherent value, and cultivate a deep sense of self-worth.

By engaging with this guide, you’ll gain insights into unanticipated avenues that lead to a profound understanding of your life’s purpose. It offers a roadmap to empower you in scripting your life’s narrative in a way that resonates deeply with your aspirations and desires. Prepare to embark on a journey of self-discovery that will redefine your life’s trajectory.

Let this guide be your compass as you navigate the often complex journey towards unveiling your life’s purpose and building a life that truly resonates with your authentic self.

10.  How Do I Set Goals And What Goals Should I Set?

The pursuit of our dreams and aspirations, goal setting serves as a powerful tool to elevate our endeavors. Through the act of setting clear goals, we not only gain a sense of purpose but also discern the path towards achieving more.

Without a doubt, goal-oriented individuals are more likely to achieve the success they aspire to, especially when they translate their intentions into written goals and engage in consistent self-evaluation. This crucial self-evaluation prompts the asking of important questions that help recalibrate our journey.

Amid this journey, there are pivotal inquiries that guide our progress:

• “What changes can I implement to better align with my goals?”
• “Is this the direction I genuinely want to pursue?”
• “Are my recent choices contributing to my overall happiness?”

As I’ve integrated these questions into my routine, my life has undergone a remarkable transformation. The positive shift in my goal-setting habits has proven to be a catalyst for success. It’s essential to recognize that individuals who lack defined goals or who refrain from introspection often fall short of their desired achievements.

The profound impact of self-awareness and consistent evaluation can’t be overstated. They form the bedrock of designing a successful life. By delving into your inner landscape and understanding the accumulated wisdom from your experiences, you regain control over your journey and navigate through life’s intricacies with greater ease.

To further aid you on this journey of empowerment, I’ve penned a comprehensive blog post that not only addresses how to set impactful goals but also introduces an ultimate Goal Planner/Chaser. This tool is designed to assist you in not only setting goals but crushing them as well.

Your journey to self-awareness and empowerment also involves checking in with yourself. These questions serve as your navigational tools, leading you towards personal growth and transformation. If these questions resonate deeply with you, consider embarking on a continuous journey of self-discovery with The Life Compass workbook. This resource is a treasure trove of over 100 prompts, along with a plethora of self-improvement exercises, empowering you to consistently evaluate your life’s trajectory and take ownership of your overall well-being.